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    Nexus Images Nexus Images yahoo groups javed chaudhry column

    Ticket Please!
    **Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket.
    How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?“ asks an accountant. Watch and you˜ll see answers an engineer.
    They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all Three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them. hortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. e knocks on the restroom door and says, Ticket, please

    The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

    The accountants saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decid ... Read more »
    Views: 701 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 03/04/2011 | Comments (0)

    GABBAR- KITANE AADMI THE?

    SAMBHA- SARDAR 2

    GABBAR- MUHJE GINTI NAHI AATI..... 2 KITNA HOTA HAI

    SAMBHA-SARDA 2 EK KE BAD AATA HAI

    GABBAR- AUR 2 KE PAHLE

    SAMBAH-SARDAR DO KE PAHLE EK AATA HAI

    GABBAR- TO BICH MAI KOUN AATA HAI

    SAMBHA-BICH ME KOI NAHI AATA

    GABBAR- TO FIR DONO EK SATH KYU NAHI AATE

    SAMBHA-SARDAR DO EK KE BAD HI AA SAKTA HAI, KYUKI DO 1 SE BADA HAI

    GABBAR- DO EK SE KITNA BADA HAI

    SABHA-DO EK SE 1 BADA HAI

    GABBAR- DO EK SE EK BADA HAI TO EK EK SE KITNA BADA HAI

    SAMBHA- SARDAR MAINE AAPKA NAMAK KHAYA HAI
    MUJHEEEE.... ...GOLI MAR DO........
    Views: 697 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 24/03/2011 | Comments (0)

    Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?
    >(anyone) Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.
    Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!
    Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?
    Caller: I'm Sum Wan .And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.
    Operator: I know u are someone and u want to talk to anyone! But what's
    this urgent matter about?
    Caller: Well just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother, Noe Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.
    Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital from the accident that isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!
    Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?
    Operator: I'm Saw Lee.Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name
    < ... Read more »
    Views: 650 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 24/03/2011 | Comments (0)

    Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure
    whether to send you to Heaven or Hell! After all, you helped society
    enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet
    you created that ghastly Windows. I'm going to do something I've never
    done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"

    Mr. Gates replied, "Well, thanks, Lord. What's the difference between
    the two?"

    God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will help
    you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure!" said Bill. "Let's go!"


    Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters.
    There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the
    water, laughing and fro@@@@ about.

    The sun was shining and the temperature was just perfect!

    Bill said, "This is great! If this is Hell, I can't wait to see
    Heav ... Read more »
    Views: 711 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 24/03/2011 | Comments (0)

    Once upon a time a married couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary. They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in their period of 25 years. Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of their well known "happy going marriage".

    Editor: "Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible?"

    Husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: "We had been to Shimla for honeymoon after marriage. Having selected the horse riding finally, we both started the ride on different horses. My horse was pretty okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy one.
    On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over. Recovering her position from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said "This is your first time". She again climbed the horse and continued with ... Read more »
    Views: 645 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 24/03/2011 | Comments (0)

    An INTERVIEW

    OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR NAME ?

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : TELL ME PROPERLY

    CANDIDATE : MOHAN PAL SIR

    OFFICER : YOUR FATHER'S NAME ?

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?

    CANDIDATE : MANMOHAN PAL SIR

    OFFICER : YOUR NATIVE PLACE

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : IS IT MADHYA PRADESH ?

    CANDIDATE : NO, MUNNUR PAL SIR

    OFFICER : WHAT IS YOUR QUALIFICATION?

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : (ANGRILY) WHAT IS IT ?

    CANDIDATE : METRIC PASS sir

    OFFICER : WHY DO YOU NEED A JOB ?

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : AND WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?

    CANDIDATE : MONEY PROBLEM SIR

    OFFICER : DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY

    CANDIDATE : M P. SIR

    OFFICER : EXPLAIN YOURSELF CLEARLY

    CANDIDATE : MAGNANIMOUS PERSONALITY SIR

    OFFICER : THIS DISCUSSION IS NOWHERE, YOU MAY GO NOW < ... Read more »
    Views: 709 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 24/03/2011 | Comments (0)


    Views: 674 | Added by: ronshan | Date: 11/02/2011 | Comments (0)

    Is your birthday day 1 of the month?
    Your Life
    You are very curious and dedicative. When you are interested in something,
    everything else has to wait. This is your quality. But if you learn to be
    more patient and complete what you have started, you will be successful in
    life.
    Your Love
    You believe in love at first sight. You won't wait to learn more about the
    person. Vise versa, people who fail to impress you will hardly get a chance
    to be your friend. Your emotion is on the extreme. You can only love or
    hate, nothing in between and this often shows in your ____ex-pression. Try not to
    end a relationship in a quarrel.
    ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- ---------
    ... Read more »
    Views: 576 | Added by: ronshan | Date: 10/02/2011 | Comments (0)


    POINTS ON HOW TO IMPROVE YOUR LIFE
    Personality:
    1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
    2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
    3. Don't over do; keep your limits
    4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
    5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
    6. Dream more while you are awake
    7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
    8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
    9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others. 10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
    11. No one ... Read more »
    Views: 594 | Added by: ronshaan | Date: 10/02/2011 | Comments (0)

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